Editorial Comment

Oct. 2002 Vol. 223 No. 10  Editorial Comment

Thomas R. Wright, Jr.,  Publisher

Hypocrite summit. Although we didn’t expected much of consequence to come out of the latest Earth Summit in Johannesburg, South Africa, we were surprised at the scathing criticism spewing forth from the online version of the UK’s Sun Newspaper. But there it was – the left-leaning press raising cane because the world’s leading socialists were "living high on the hog."

In addition to having us all ride bicycles and live in grass huts lit by solar or wind power, another goal of the summit was to find a way to end famine. A noble cause indeed, but according to reporter Neil Syson, the money thrown at feeding and entertaining the summit’s high-rolling delegates would have been a good place to start.

Instead, the "sickening champagne and caviar lifestyle being enjoyed by Earth Summit delegates was exposed . . . (as they were) gorging on mountains of lobster, oysters and fillet steak," wrote Syson. Despite having 60,000 delegates to pick on, the Sun focused on UK Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott and his entourage partaking of vintage bubbly and brandy paid for by British taxpayers.

The bill for the 70-strong British party was estimated to total £500,000 ($750,000). For once, we can’t disagree with the Friends of the Earth, who called the extravagance "deplorable." Desmond Morgan, head chef of the posh hotel that hosted the summit, set out mountains of fancy food – including 5,000 oysters, more than 1,000 lb of lobster and other shellfish, buckets of caviar and piles of pâté de foie gras. He also laid in more than 4,400 lb of steak and chicken breasts, 4,500 lb of salmon, 220 lb of a South African fish called kingclip and more than 1,000 lb of bacon and sausages. Vintage champagne, fine wines, spirits and liqueurs were flown in from around the globe so the VIPs could wash down their meals in style.

The £35-million summit was centered around Sandton, the most exclusive suburb in Africa. But nearby is the sprawling shantytown of Alexandra, where, according to Syson, the average weekly wage is less than the cost of a vintage brandy at the Michelangelo hotel.

Further hypocrisy arose from the hundreds of trees that were cut down around the conference center so that fleets of limousines would have unhindered access.

Tory MP Teddy Taylor dismissed the summit as absurd, saying, "I’m sure nothing will be achieved at the meeting, except for photo opportunities allowing politicians to say how great they are."

Just about the time we were really beginning to enjoy the Sun article, Syson burst our bubble by reverting to a typical liberal view: "U.S. President George Bush is NOT attending Johannesburg, even though he is the leader of the world’s biggest polluter." Climate change was not directly on the agenda, and former UN climate scientist Robert Watson claimed it was left off because of pressure from the U.S.

Oh well, all good things must end.

Don’t spoil my view with renewable energy. The limousine liberals on the U.S. East Coast are experiencing apoplexy because a private company wants to provide renewable energy to the Nantucket Sound area. Why, you ask, would the International Wildlife Coalition, Humane Society, Ocean Conservancy and even Senator Ted Kennedy be against such a noble effort to reduce the country’s dependence on (gasp!) petroleum?

Unfortunately, for the other "greenies" who promote wind power, the brouhaha results from plans to install an offshore wind farm. But it seems the Cape Cod, Martha’s Vineyard and Nantucket elite don’t see the classic beauty of wind turbines on an ocean horizon.

The wind farmers, formerly on the green side, now issue arguments very similar to those we oil folk make concerning Arctic oil development and caribou. Cape Wind Associates wants to erect wind turbines six miles out in Nantucket Sound. Another company, Winergy, would construct a similar "eyesore" on Nantucket’s other side.

On the opposing side, as the Wall Street Journal reports, groups such as Save Our Sound (SOS) are appealing to the eastern mass media (guess where they vacation) to help halt the despicable project. They have brought in the bird watchers to describe what would become a giant avian Cusinart and local fishermen to represent the working class. We don’t understand why the fishermen are concerned – maybe they think the artificial reefs that would result from the windmills will attract too many fish, thereby increasing the catch and driving down prices. At least SOS is smart enough to realize that most Americans won’t be able to identify with their plight, but could empathize with the poor fishermen.

Wind opponents blubbered that seals and dolphins would be threatened by the windmills’ vibrations. And the wind baggers even called in some air-traffic controllers to describe the perils the windmills would present to small aircraft.

In view of the above, now seems an opportune time for the oil industry to form a coalition with SOS. With some comparative statistics showing how one 24-well platform could provide the equivalent power of a string of windmills stretching from one end of the horizon to the other, the Oil Is Less Yucky (OILY) coalition should surely be able to convince all concerned that petroleum makes for a better view than wind. Just envision Jennings, Rather and Brokaw explaining how this would produce one tiny speck on the horizon, instead of a continuous line of whirling blades.

Making a bad deal good. A city boy, Andy, moved to the country and bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.

A day later, the farmer came rattling up in his old truck and said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the donkey died."

Andy replied, "Well then, just give me my money back."

"Can’t do that," the farmer said, "I spent it already."

Andy said, "OK, at least give me the donkey."

The farmer laughed and asked, "What are you going do with a dead donkey?"

"I’m going to raffle him off," Andy replied.

Now laughing even harder, the farmer said, "You can’t do that!"

"Sure I can," said Andy, "I just won’t tell anybody he’s dead."

A month later the farmer happened to run into Andy and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?"

"I raffled him off," Andy explained. "I sold 500 tickets at $2.00 a piece and made a profit of $898.00."

"Didn’t anybody complain?" asked the farmer.

"Just the guy who won," replied Andy. "So I gave him back his $2.00"

Then, Andy grew up, eventually becoming the CFO of Enron.  

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